Originally Published: Nov 10, 2025
In 1993, the police began the investigation that ultimately led to my father’s arrest and conviction for sexually assaulting me when I was a child. I was an adult when I finally reported the crime. My brothers and sister had their own experiences with our father too.
I was fortunate. Canada provided me with counselling — support that today would cost around $250 an hour. The trial went on for almost three years. Sometimes I was in my therapist’s office twice a week, always at least once. I would not have made it through without that help.
It was a very different experience for my brothers. Back then, there was nowhere for a man to go for help if he had been sexually assaulted as a child. Nowhere. Some of my brothers didn’t make it.
That’s why I believe so deeply in The Gatehouse, a space where male survivors can now find understanding, safety, and healing.
Tonight, I’ll be at the Man Enough to Heal event to express my gratitude for the courageous and powerful men who show up there — and to honour my late brothers, who are always with me in spirit.
One day, I hope my surviving brother and sister will come with me. I’m determined. I’m patient. Until then, I show up for my family — both the living and the gone.
Someone said to me yesterday, “Often the hardest part is just showing up.”
If you’re reading this and you’ve been thinking about reaching out for support, or joining a community like The Gatehouse — this is your sign.
Show up. You’re not alone.